PAUL BRYAN'S JOURNAL
From the diary about this episode:
Tuesday - Wednesday, July 6 - 7
Rang Jessica in Chicago to offer thanks for lending me her car. Genuine as always, she described plans to go to Paris shopping, and seemed happier. That gave me a little lift, but I couldn't get the tragic death of Bud and Lee off my mind.
Was met at Kansas City Airport by a Miss Smith who drove me out to Eileen's in a quiet suburban town a few miles away. She said she'd be handing me an envelope for delivery to Switzerland at my departure. This woman is Eileen's security blanket, and does all the outside things.
Eileen, seeming unusually calm, said that she hadn't left the secure house since she'd arrived, and I was her first real guest - aside from her psychiatrist who came over every day. At first the atmosphere seemed spooky, but I knew that everything was intended to restore Eileen's sense of trust and security.
“I'm Evelyn Marsh,” she laughed, when she came out, and I said that I'd just call her Bumble, as always. We then spent a long time talking about what we'd each been doing in the 15 years since I left for the Air Force.
After completing two years at Cal Eileen went to Paris, getting a degree from the Sorbonne. There was a photo from her time there - the only one I saw in the house - of herself with Jacqueline Kennedy, the girls' arms across each others' shoulders, heads thrown back in gales of laughter, an unreadable banner held in their free hands.
No picture of her husband. He was the one subject that she seemed unable to speak about. But other than that, Eileen was like a garden of flowers with so many fascinating stories of her life - having spent a few years in Switzerland, and then gone on to live in Italy.
Since leaving San Francisco in April, I've felt some necessity to be secretive about myself, and it was wonderful to just be able to answer Bumble's questions freely and openly. Hours slipped away as if minutes.
Miss Smith, who turned out to be a fine cook as well as guard and companion, joined us for dinner, and then left the house for several hours. Bumble and I came still closer, and when the evening was over, I think we were both feeling quite sentimental for our youth together.
In the morning she seemed more relaxed and refreshed, and told me my presence had been better than a thousand therapy sessions. Admitting that she'd probably be walking on eggs for a while, Bumble was still sure that a time would come that she could start living normally, work and be creative again.
Carried away, I added, “and join me on some of my travels,” unable to help feeling a sense of joy that she looked forward to the idea. Once again we'd be Polo and Bumble, the Robin and Marian of West Almeria.
We talked - and then even laughed - until our throats were dry, and as our second day together developed, I found myself feeling less of a need to protect her, surely the result of an instinct that she would get over the horror, and blossom again.
Kansas - Texas - New Mexico - San Francisco
Thursday - Saturday, July 8 - 10
My original plan had been to fly back to California, but over breakfast, I suddenly got an idea to take a bus west, and maybe see a little of the country.
We never spoke of the diagnosis, and even though I thought it impossible to stay long in the company of someone who knew, there wasn't one uncomfortable moment with Bumble.
The day I left for Korea, she had taken my hand in hers, and put her index finger across my palm, declaring, “you have a long life line. I know you'll come back safe.”
When we said goodbye today, she made the same gesture in my hand, and said, “I have a good feeling about you.”
Miss Smith drove me into a nearby town, and handed me an envelope, saying that I'd get further instructions about it later. Shortly after I boarded a west-bound bus, a young girl named Tina got on, and stuck to me like glue until I delivered her to her father in Albuquerque.
It turned out that she had run away from her grandparents in New Jersey. Maybe because I'd experienced his company and fate so recently, I had the feeling that this girl could easily turn into a female version of Bud.
She was out of control and wildly over confident, so it seemed worth the effort to make a stab at offering a good influence or providing a little guidance.
As things were, both were probably impossible goals, but at least I got her into a situation where she'll get good care and love - and I came out of it without being arrested for transporting a minor over state lines - as well as a few other charges thrown in for good measure.
The fact that I had to spend Friday night in the parking lot of a garage when the bus broke down was just another reason while I'll stay away from this mode of transport in future.
Soon as I dropped Tina off, made it hot footed to the airport, and flew back home where a telegram arrived saying that a reservation had been made on Monday's Swissair flight from New York to Zurich.
There was also a letter from Kate. She wrote that after our sudden reunion, she had needed some time and space to come to terms with everything, then said, she now knew she wanted us to be together as much as my new life would allow.
I was shocked, gratified and filled with love. I hadn't spoken to Kate since last leaving for Europe, and now my thoughts about us were complicated by the affair with Leslie.
As passionate as it had been, I'm somehow looking back at that time as one of innocence - something that really didn't intrude into my relationship with Kate - be it Just Friends as she indicated her doctor had advised until she was stronger, or the way we were before.
On the phone she was very warm, and quickly accepted my invitation to dinner, even suggested we order in a pizza at my house. As we ate I filled her in on all my adventures. By the expression in her eyes, I could sense she read straight into what happened with Leslie, even though I focused on my scuba diving and Henri's death.
After dinner, I broke the news that I'm selling the house. While insisting that it didn't mean I'd never come back to San Francisco, and would keep Granny's place on the cliffs, it was clear from the way she looked around the room, that in the make-believe world we had tried to reside in, Katie still saw herself coming to live here as my wife.
Sunday, July 11
Knew today would be a hard one, but kept telling myself that I was parting with treasured possessions to get into racing, and not for another reason.
When I'd spoken to the broker on the phone, he said it would be quick work to sell a Cessna 182, and I can't put this off any longer. Went out to the airport to make sure all the documentation was in order, and then say goodbye and clear out the Abel Leader.
How many weekends she spirited me away to Mexico or up north, or just took me into the clouds to clear my head. I sat at the controls and said to myself, “if you can do this, you can do anything,” and tried to picture myself instead flying through the streets of Monte Carlo.
Parting with the Sea Farm was ….. harder. Only in one way less of a wrench, since Garrett Hamilton is buying her. “You can have her back anytime you want,” he said encouragingly over lunch at the yacht club, implying that he'd probably outgrow a Cal 40, and would be happy to put her back in my hands eventually.
Though meditating for years, trying to increase my mental control as part of preparation for politics, I certainly didn't get far enough down the road for the situation I'm now in.
Instead of thinking Monaco, Monaco, Monaco, the only thought in my mind was the pride and thrill I felt the day I bought that beautiful boat, and all the memories that have attached to her in the meantime.
After lunch went to see Tim Lewis, and asked him to handle the house sale, then went "home" and packed a few boxes. Now over to Kate's for what feels like the ending of something.
After lunch went to see Tim Lewis, and asked him to handle the house sale, then went "home" and packed a few boxes. Now over to Kate's for what feels like the ending of something.
When she took me to the airport, Kate remained in a melancholy mood from last night. It's easy enough to assume I'm the cause, but she said she didn't feel like talking about what was bothering her because it might be nothing. Told her to get in touch if she wanted a shoulder to lean on, but knew my words sounded hollow.
Swissair flight from New York to Zurich
Monday, July 12
My business in San Francisco is concluded, it's the next six months and the deal I'm going to sign with Pete in London that must be my focus now.
After picking up my ticket at the JFK reservations desk, a man stopped me and said I'd left my newspaper on the counter. I hadn't, but he disappeared almost instantly after handing it to me. At the top was scribbled an address in Zermatt.
Journal continued in next column
Tina takes the seat next to Paul on the bus
Tina begs Paul to go with her to Los Angeles
Paul finds Tina hiding in a crate
Paul claps his hand over Tina's scream
Tina insists on staying in Paul's motel room
Paul throws Tina out of the car
Paul reads in the paper about Tina running away
They talk about Tina's family situation
They arrive at her father's bookshop
Her father's wife introduces herself
Tins's father and his wife offer hospitality to Paul
Tina feels sure that she's guessed Paul's secret
Soon as dinner was served, I tried to let my mind go blank. Amazingly, it cooperated, and I slept until breakfast. Still, hate having to fly over New York. It makes everything seem so much slower than going direct.
Tuesday, July 13
Felt immediately at home on arrival in Zurich, and determined to come to Switzerland as often as possible. All of a sudden, I was cursing Mike Allen a little less for this quite pleasant detour, the journey to Zermatt enhancing the assignment all the more.
A young girl approached me when I got off the train, asking if I were looking for Oberdorf Strasse, and offering to show me the way, walking along until we came to the house number that had been written on my newspaper. She pointed at the building, and went on her way as I entered.
Behind a very elegant desk sat a receptionist who asked me if I had something from Miss Smith. “And you were visiting Evelyn ….?” “Marsh,” I completed Eileen's new name, and she reached out for the envelope Miss Smith had handed me at the Kansas bus station.
The receptionist wished me a pleasant day, as if to dismiss me, and I wandered around Zermatt for a while and had a meal, then decided to stay overnight. My room is overlooking a meadow, and the air is like champagne. I could easily just stay here forever.
Read Next :
Making a scene when she gets on a bus travelling to Los Angeles,a precocious and unconventional teenage girl asks to sit next to Paul and after being rejected by another passenger. She says her name is Tina, and she's wearing oversized boots, but will not explain this or tell anything else about herself. Tdue to a breakdown, passengers have to spend the night on the bus or the ground beside it until a replacement reaches the service station where it stopped. Saying she's frightened, Tina insists on sleeping next to Paul even though he asks her not to.
From this point onwards Tina uses a combination of threat and appeal to Paul's pity to get what she wants without ever revealing anything. The bus journey begins again, and Paul gets off where he is to change for a route to San Francisco, but with worry over Tina, he checks her bag and sees she has no money. Suspecting she is a runaway, he wants to help, but she only wants him to get back on the bus to Los Angeles with her. As he tries to board his bus, she pulls him back, and says he stole her blind like everyone else . Then she runs from the Los Angeles bus with two men pursuing her.
Paul removes his bag from the San Francisco bus, and goes in the direction Tina ran into a shed full of crates. He hears her guitar in one of them, but she won't come out, and makes him get inside.
She won't tell him who the men were, and begins to threaten that she'll accuse Paul of statutory rape if he doesn't take her to Los Angeles.
Tinasays she's willing to do anything to destroy her enemies, and wants to know whether or not he's a friend. He suggests calling her bluff, and walks out of the shed.
But she then begins screaming at the top of her lungs. Paul races back and claps his hand over Tina's mouth, saying that she's a delinquent and a liar, and could cost him a month of his life. Then he says, if she tells him what she's headed from or to, he will take her to Los Angeles if he can. But Tina declares belligerently that she's already answered all these questions.
So Paul tells her that she is on her own, and walks away. She goes from being sweet again to threatening him with charges, and back again. And Paul as well turns away, stops and turns away before stopping again.
So Paul goes ahead and rents a car to drive Tina to Los Angeles. They stop at a motel, but she leaves her room to come to his, and insists on sleeping there. She even enters the bathroom while he is taking a shower, supposedly to drink endless glasses of water.
As they are driving west the next day, she asks if they might be going anywhere near Albuquerque, telling him she wants to get some boots there, though first saying she knew a place where she could score. Paul says they can go to Albuquerque, and then they hear a siren behind them.
Tina tells him to pretend he is her father, and she calls him “daddy” in the deputy's presence. After looking at Paul's license, the deputy says that he's searching for a runaway girl who might be hitch hiking in the area. When he drives away Tina is gleeful, but Paul tells her it's the end of the road, and if she doesn't unconditionally tell him her true story, he will leave her here. Tina utters a loud no, and talks about all the bad things that could happen to her by the side of the road. Then she again threatens to turn him into the police for molesting her. But Paul has had enough, and makes her get out of the car, and drives away.
But he comes back and picks her up again. They stop at a service station where Paul tells Tina to stay in the car, but instead she chats with a truck driver about taking her to Albuquerque. Paul approaches, flashes some identity, and tells the driver that Tina is wanted in New Jersey for hijacking trucks, and that he just took a weapon from her. She goes back to the car with him, and he reads from a newspaper he has just bought about the search for Tina who has runaway from her grandparents home in New Jersey after a lengthy court battle between them and her recently married father who lives in Albuquerque.
Tina says that her father doesn't care about her since he has a new wife.
She claims then that she's only wants to go to Albuquerque to get a quick look at him before going on to Los Angeles, which was always her true destination. But Paul points out that he wouldn't have taken his case to the State Supreme Court if he didn't want her very much.
Tina counters that her father hasn't written to her since his marriage, then asks if Paul is going to turn her in. He says no, and hands her some food from the service station.
They start out for her father's home in Albuquerque, and talk about her family situation. Then Tina goes searching in her bag for something.
Is this what you're looking for?” Paul asks, having confiscated amphetamine tablets from her earlier. Tina is angry, but he tells her they're for people without the courage to discover. Then he gives her a lollipop to bite on until the pain passes.
Tina is not really ready when they arrive at her father's bookshop, but Paul gets her out of the car and inside.
Her father's new wife greets them when they enter, then quickly realizes that it is her husband's daughter, and full of delight, introduces herself and hugs Tina.
Then her father comes out, also with a look of joy. They embrace warmly.
Her father tries to reach Tina's grandparents to let them know she is all right. He tells her that, on advice from his lawyer, he stopped writing to her while the case was in the courts. Paul tells them that the chances are good that Tina will be able to stay in New Mexico.
Tina's father says he'll spent every penny necessary to keep her with them, and invites Paul to stay a while, but he declines, and gets up to leave. Tina goes out to the car with Paul to say goodbye.
She says she'll never see him again, and starts to cry. Then she starts up again with the game they've been playing since meeting on the bus - guessing at who Paul really is, and the nature of his true story. Tina says that while hunting for ivory in the Congo, he contracted a rare and fatal disease, and you're rambling all over the world to forget your fate.
The last words she almost forces out of her mouth, having caught something in Paul's reaction.
“Tell me I didn't guess it,” she says tentatively. He laughs, and asks, “did I scare you?” Handing her the guitar from his car, he apologizes, and says it was all in the spirit of the game. “That guess was just as wild as all the others,” he assures her. But she tells him she got so scared, feeling she'd guessed right. Paul tells her she was wrong, kisses her on the forehead, gets into his car and drives away, but Tina clearly still believes that she was right.
Notes & Comments:
While the frequently irritating and often pathetic character of Tina is all too realistic, Paul's behavior is totally uncharacteristic, and even flawed in comparison with the sharp intelligence he displays through most of the series.
This is an all too different kind of risk taking than driving fast cars and jumping out of planes, but the suspense of wondering if he'd end up in jail for an extended period turned into a damp squib.
Producer: Jo Swerling Jr.. Associate Producer: Paul Freeman, Music: Pete Rugolo, Director of Photography: William Margulies A.S.C., Art Director: Howard E. Johnson, Film Editor: David Eric Rawlins. Unit Manager: Hilton A. Green, Assistant Director: Ronnie Rondell, Set Decorators: John McCartey & James M. Walters, Sound: Frank H. Wilkinson, Color Coordinator: Robert Brower, Color by Technicolor, Editorial Dept. Head: Richard Belding, Musical Supervisor: Stanley , Wilson, Costumes Supervisor: Vincent Dee, Makeup: Bud Westmore, Hair Stylist: Larry Germain, Assistant to Executive Producer: Robert Foster